Kristine Fowler Cirby | Family Law Attorney | Marin
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How to Prepare for a Mediation with Family Court Services in Marin County

4/15/2025

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If you’re scheduled for Family Court Mediation through Family Court Services (FCS) in Marin County, you’re likely wondering what to expect and how to best prepare—especially when your child’s future is at stake. The more informed and focused you are going into the session, the better chance you have of reaching a workable parenting plan.
This post covers what you need to know about preparing for mediation in child custody and visitation matters in Marin County.
 
Understanding Family Court Services Mediation in Marin County
When parents cannot agree on child custody or visitation, the Marin County Superior Court requires them to attend mediation with Family Court Services before their court hearing.
Unlike some California counties, Marin is a recommending county, which means:
  • The mediation is not confidential.
  • If the parents do not reach an agreement, the mediator will prepare a written recommendation to the judge regarding custody and visitation.
  • If the parents do reach an agreement, that agreement is typically adopted by the court.
What Does the Mediator Do?
The mediator is a neutral, trained professional—usually with a background in mental health or social work—whose job is to help parents discuss custody and parenting time and try to reach an agreement. If no agreement is reached, the mediator's recommendation carries significant weight and is reviewed by the judge at the hearing.
 
How to Prepare for Mediation
1. Stay Focused on the Children
  • The mediation is not about the past relationship or personal grievances.
  • Always keep the focus on what is in the best interests of your child—their emotional well-being, stability, safety, and daily needs.
2. Be Honest and Respectful
  • The mediator will be writing a report to the judge, so it’s important to be honest, respectful, and thoughtful in your communication.
  • Avoid inflammatory language or making accusations without evidence.
3. Come with a Parenting Plan in Mind
  • Think about what custody and visitation schedule works best for your child.
  • Consider school schedules, extracurricular activities, holidays, and transitions between homes.
  • Be prepared to explain why your proposed schedule supports your child’s best interests.
 
Helpful Things to Bring or Prepare
  • A sample parenting schedule, including weekdays, weekends, holidays, and vacations
  • Your work schedule and any child care arrangements
  • Information about your child’s educational, medical, and emotional needs
  • Notes about any safety concerns or past co-parenting challenges
  • Ideas for communication tools (like OurFamilyWizard) if needed
  • Check Local Rules, in Marin all documents must be submitted 2 business days in advance.
 
Tips for the Day of Mediation
  • Be on time: Whether your session is in person or via Zoom, arrive early and prepared.
  • Dress appropriately: This is a formal court process—even if done remotely.
  • Take notes: You may want to write down key points discussed during the session.
  • Do not bring your children: Children are not allowed in mediation sessions, but depending on your child’s age, the Mediator may ask to speak to your child after speaking with both parents.
 
After Mediation: What Happens Next?
  • If you and the other parent reach an agreement, the mediator will prepare a written agreement and submit it to the court for the judge’s approval.
  • If you do not reach an agreement, the mediator will submit a formal recommendation to the judge, which the court will review at your upcoming hearing.
  • You or your attorney will have an opportunity to object to the recommendation or propose alternatives at the hearing.
 
Final Thoughts
Family Court Services mediation in Marin County is a key step in resolving custody and visitation issues. Because the mediator’s recommendation can heavily influence the judge’s decision, it’s critical to be prepared, child-focused, and respectful throughout the process.
If you have questions about the mediation process or want guidance to prepare effectively, I encourage you to reach out. With the right preparation and support, you can help protect your child’s well-being and move toward a stable, workable parenting arrangement.
 © Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby. Any information you obtain from this article is not legal advice. Legal counsel should be sought for the answers to specific legal questions. This communication is an advertisement as defined by The Rules of Professional Conduct and California Business and Professions Code. 
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How to File for Divorce in California: A Step-by-Step Guide from a Marin County Family Law Attorney

3/28/2025

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Filing for divorce is never a decision taken lightly. Whether you've been considering it for some time or find yourself facing the unexpected, knowing what to expect can help ease the uncertainty. At the Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby, we’ve guided thousands of clients through this deeply personal process with clarity, compassion, and over 30 years of family law experience—26 of those in Marin County.  If you’re thinking about divorce in California, here’s what you need to know:

1. Do You Meet California’s Residency Requirements? Before you can file for divorce in California, either you or your spouse must have:
  • Lived in California for at least six months, and
  • Lived in the county where you plan to file (for example, Marin County) for at least three months.
If you don’t yet meet these requirements, you may still be able to file for legal separation until you do.

2. California is a No-Fault Divorce State You don’t need to prove that either spouse did anything wrong. The most common legal ground is simply “irreconcilable differences”—which means the relationship has broken down beyond repair.

3. The Paperwork: Filing for Divorce To begin your case, you (the Petitioner) must file the following documents with the court:
  • FL-100 – Petition for Dissolution of Marriage
  • FL-110 – Summons
  • FL-105 – Declaration Under UCCJEA (if you have children under 18)
These forms provide the court with essential information about your marriage, children, property, and what you’re asking the court to decide.
Once filed, there is a court filing fee, currently around $435. If you are unable to afford this, you may qualify for a fee waiver.

4. Serving the Divorce Papers California law requires that your spouse (the Respondent) be personally served with the filed documents. You cannot do this yourself, but a third party (over age 18 and not involved in the case) can serve the documents. We assist clients in coordinating service properly and efficiently.

5. The Response Period After being served, your spouse has 30 days to file a Response (FL-120). If they do not respond, the case may proceed by default. If they want to participate, we can have a default with agreement. If they do not want to participate you can still get divorced. If they do respond and there are disagreements over custody, property, or support, the case becomes contested—and we’ll work with you on strategy moving forward.

6. Exchanging Financial Information Both spouses are required to exchange Preliminary Declarations of Disclosure, which include:
  • Income and expense reports
  • Property and debt disclosures
  • Supporting documents such as tax returns and pay stubs
These disclosures are essential to ensure a fair and transparent process, and are legally required before a divorce can be finalized.

7. Working Toward Resolution In many cases, we help our clients reach a marital settlement agreement through:
  • Direct negotiation
  • Mediation
  • Collaborative divorce
When agreements cannot be reached, we are fully prepared to represent your interests in court. Kristine’s extensive litigation experience in Marin County ensures your case is in capable hands.

8. Finalizing the Divorce Even if everything is resolved quickly, California requires a minimum six-month waiting period from the date your spouse was served before the court can finalize your divorce. Once that period has passed and all paperwork is submitted, the court can issue your Judgment of Dissolution—and your divorce will be official.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone Divorce is not just a legal process—it’s an emotional and often life-changing journey. At the Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby, we are committed to helping you move forward with confidence, clarity, and compassion.
If you're considering divorce or have questions about your options, we’re here to help. 📞 Contact us today to schedule a consultation.
Let’s talk about what’s next—and how we can support you through it.

© Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby. Any information you obtain from this article is not legal advice. Legal counsel should be sought for the answers to specific legal questions. This communication is an advertisement as defined by The Rules of Professional Conduct and California Business and Professions Code.  By Kristine Fowler Cirby, Esq.

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Preparing for Divorce: A Comprehensive Guide to Navigating the Financial and Emotional Challenges

7/10/2024

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Divorce is a life-altering event that necessitates meticulous planning and preparation. The following guide is designed to help you navigate the financial, emotional, and practical aspects of divorce, ensuring you emerge from the process as strong and stable as possible.
1. Financial Preparation: A Reality Check
  • Spreadsheet of Income and Bills: Create a detailed spreadsheet comparing your current income and expenses with what you anticipate post-divorce. This will serve as a crucial reality check and help you plan accordingly.
  • Child Support and Spousal support: Recognize that collecting child support or spousal support can be challenging and is often less money than expected. Secure a stable full-time job and, if necessary, pursue further education to ensure you can support yourself and your children.
  • Legal Fees: Ensure you have the resources to afford a competent attorney.
2. Organization and Documentation
  • Financial Information Access: Make sure you have access to all financial documents, including tax records, bank statements, and account details. Make copies of everything (even just the envelopes if you are concerned about opening it). This will prevent any surprises and keep you informed about your financial standing.
  • Debt Management: Pay off and close joint accounts where possible to protect both parties' credit ratings.
  • Documentation: Gather essential financial documents such as tax returns, bank statements, and pay stubs. Photocopy everything to avoid accusations of withholding information.
3. Emotional and Psychological Support
  • Counseling: Engage in individual counseling. A therapist can help you process the emotional aspects of divorce and provide strategies for coping.
  • Support System: Find someone you trust to confide in. Your attorney should focus on legal matters, not emotional support.
4. Practical Steps and Safety Measures
  • Housing: If you plan to move out, start looking for a new place to live early on.
  • Inventory and Personal Property: Inventory your personal belongings, especially items with sentimental value. Take photographs of everything for documentation purposes.
  • Password Changes: Change passwords for all your online accounts, including email and cloud storage. Disable any shared tracking features like "Find My Phone."
  • New Bank Accounts: Open individual bank accounts and consider getting a PO box for secure communication.
  • Medical Needs: Ensure all medical needs are addressed, particularly if your insurance is through your spouse.
  • Digital Security: Avoid using shared computers for sensitive communications or research related to the divorce.
5. Children’s Well-being
  • Consistency for Children: Coordinate a schedule to maintain as much stability as possible for your children.  You may want to engage a coparenting counselor to help you and your spouse navigate telling the children and working out other parenting issues.
  • Counseling for Children: Consider child-centered counseling to help your children adjust to the changes.
  • Custody Considerations: Ensure all decisions are made with the children’s best interests in mind and avoid any illegal activities that could jeopardize custody arrangements.
6. Additional Precautions
  • Legal Documents: Obtain a Durable Power of Attorney and Health Care Surrogate, naming someone other than your spouse as your agent.
  • Closet and Space Organization: Declutter and organize your personal spaces. This can be therapeutic and helps you manage what you need to take with you.
  • Budgeting: Create a budget that reflects your new financial reality.
  • Pet Care: Update your pets’ medical records and ensure all their documents are in order.
7. Learning from Others
  • Inspirational Stories: Gather stories from people who have successfully navigated divorce and rebuilt their lives. This can provide hope and practical insights.
Divorce is undoubtedly challenging, but with careful preparation and support, you can manage the transition effectively. Focus on securing your financial independence, maintaining emotional stability, and prioritizing your children’s well-being to navigate this life change successfully.
​​I advise my client based on the facts and the law, with a discussion of the cost benefit analysis. Call today to schedule a consultation with my office.
© Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby. Any information you obtain from this article is not legal advice. Legal counsel should be sought for the answers to specific legal questions. This communication is an advertisement as defined by The Rules of Professional Conduct and California Business and Professions Code. 
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Do I Need a Prenuptial Agreement?

12/1/2023

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As a family law attorney in California, I often advise clients to consider a prenuptial agreement before getting married. Here are some reasons why:
1.                 Protect separate property: A prenup can define and protect assets that each spouse owns separately before the marriage, such as inheritance, gifts, or business interests. Without a prenup, these assets may become community property and subject to division in case of divorce.
2.                 Clarify financial expectations: A prenup can outline how the couple will handle finances during the marriage, such as income, expenses, debts, and savings. This can help prevent misunderstandings or conflicts later on, especially if one spouse earns significantly more or has different financial priorities.
3.                 Minimize legal costs: A prenup can streamline the divorce process by resolving some of the key issues in advance, such as property division, spousal support, or attorney's fees. This can save both time and money, as well as reduce emotional stress.
4.                 Protect family relationships: A prenup can also address non-financial matters that may affect the couple's relationship or their families, such as custody, visitation, relocation, or inheritance rights. By clarifying these issues beforehand, a prenup can help prevent future disputes or court battles.
Of course, a prenup is not for everyone, and it may not cover all possible scenarios or changes that may occur during the marriage. However, for those who have significant assets, liabilities, or concerns, a prenup can offer peace of mind and legal protection. If you are considering a prenup in California, I am happy to help you navigate the legal requirements and implications.
I advise my client based on the facts and the law, with a discussion of the cost benefit analysis. Call today to schedule a consultation with my office.
 © Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby Any information you obtain from this article is not legal advice. Legal counsel should be sought for the answers to specific legal questions. This communication is an advertisement as defined by The Rules of Professional Conduct and California Business and Professions Code. ​
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Child Support Basics

10/1/2023

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As a California attorney, I'm often asked about child support laws in our state. Here's what you need to know:
*California courts use a formula to determine child support payments, based on factors such as each parent's income, custody arrangement, and the child's needs.
*Both parents are responsible for financially supporting their child, regardless of whether they were married.
*Child support payments typically continue until the child turns 18 or graduates from high school, whichever is later.
*If a parent fails to pay child support, they may face penalties such as loss of a driver's license, loss of a passport, tax refund intercepts, and even jail time.
*Childcare and uninsured medical expenses are typically shared, in addition to monthly child support.

It's important to remember that child support is intended to provide for the needs of the child, and it's not optional.
I advise my client based on the facts and the law, with a discussion of the cost benefit analysis. Call today to schedule a consultation with my office.
I advise my client based on the facts and the law, with a discussion of the cost benefit analysis. Call today to schedule a consultation with my office.

 © Law Office of Kristine Fowler Cirby Any information you obtain from this article is not legal advice. Legal counsel should be sought for the answers to specific legal questions. This communication is an advertisement as defined by The Rules of Professional Conduct and California Business and Professions Code. 
 
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Visiting this website, sending an email, or contacting our office does not constitute an attorney-client relationship. Any information you obtain at this site is not legal advice.  Legal counsel should be sought for the answers to specific legal questions. This communication is an advertisement as defined by The Rules of Professional Conduct and California Business and Professions Code. Past results do not guarantee future results.

© Kristine Fowler Cirby | 101 Larkspur Landing Circle, Suite 311 Larkspur, CA 94939 | 415-332-0222 | [email protected]
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